Transgender Day of Visibility 2016

March 31, 2016, is Transgender Day of Visibility.  The annual event was created to celebrate Transgender people and raising awareness of discrimination faced by transgender people worldwide.

This year’s Day of Visibility is even more important than ever.  Just last week the North Carolina Legislature and their anti-LGBTQ Governor signed HB2 into law.  This bill took less than 24 hours to become a law – that’s crazy!!

HB2 is the most restrictive and discriminatory law in the United States, it requires all North Carolina public schools, public college campuses and government agencies, including government-run hospitals, to maintain and guarantee bathrooms or locker rooms be designated for use only by people based on their biological sex.

The legislation went even further making it impossible for cities, towns and counties to pass anti-discrimination rules for their local jurisdiction, beyond the new state standard.

With HB2, there are no longer any discrimination protections for any member of the LGBT community regarding employment, housing or service.

There remain over 30 similar bills in state legislatures around the country to still waiting to be heard.  These bills, written by these legislators are nothing more than government condoned bullying.

The majority of these bills target the Transgender Community and the most vulnerable within the community our youth and teens. These young people need the adults in their lives, schools, communities and in their governments to understand that going to the bathroom is a human necessity.  Forcing someone with gender dysphoria to use the bathroom of your birth sex, as oppose to their gender identity is a terrifying experience.  Bathrooms are the scariest place on a school campus, just ahead of the locker room.

I can attest to these fears being real.Bathrooms and locker rooms were my largest source of anxiety, stress and fear when I was in high school. I would wait as long as possible during school, to the point of pain and discomfort, to use a bathroom.  On days when I need to go to the bathroom, I would attempt to use the nurse’s office, but if that wasn’t an option – the boy’s room was my last resort and the most dangerous place in school for me.

One door, in and out and no doors on the stalls.  All that needed to happen was to have one of my bullies walk in while I was there and yes I had bullies!   At best, I would be harassed, pushed, spit at or worst beaten up.  Fortunately, for me, verbal harassment and a couple of good shoves were worst things that ever happened to me, but others were not so lucky.

To this day, because of the bathroom anxiety I experienced in school, I constantly suffer.   In my mid-twenties, I was diagnosed with Diverticulosis, a condition not typically seen until the age of 50 plus, which I ‘ve spent years controlling sometimes better than others.  I have a difficulty fully voiding my bladder, leading to multiple trips to the bathroom a day.   Now, years after transitioning, the women’s restroom can be a place of anxiety, with long waiting lines, limited space and  single stall access.

So if you think this whole bathroom thing is a joke?  I’m here to tell you it’s not.  It has real emotional and physical consequences for these kids, not just today for years to come.

New Coaching Groups for Transgender starting.

I’ll be starting two new coaching “Crews” in April for Transgender Clients.

The first crew will meet by phone on Mondays at 6:00pm est/3:00pm pst and starts April 11, 2016

The second crew will meet by phone on Saturdays at 2:00pm est/11:00am pst and starts April 16, 2016.

I only take 5 clients in each crew, so space is limited.

For more details about group coaching – click here.

Have more questions about coaching in general or maybe you want to see if coaching may be right for you visit here.

To register today Click Here

Early Bird Special Ends March 31, 2016.

10 Basics for Spring 2016

Spring is right around the corner!  So what better time to put together my 10 must-haves for Spring 2016.  While I don’t have these exact items, I do own every one of these styles and plan on rock it this season.

10 Basics for Spring

10 Basics for Spring by aejaie on Polyvore featuring Theory, Relaxfeel, Chicwish, dENiZEN, Steve Madden, Dorothy Perkins, Sam Edelman, Coach and Oscar de la Renta: Visually Similar Results Button

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A fashion look from March 2016 by Aejaie featuring Theory, Relaxfeel, Chicwish, dENiZEN, Steve Madden, Sam Edelman, Dorothy Perkins, Coach and Oscar de la Renta
10 Basics for Spring by Aejaie on Polyvore featuring Theory, Relaxfeel, Chicwish, dENiZEN, Steve Madden, Dorothy Perkins, Sam Edelman, Coach and Oscar de la Renta

10 Basics for Spring

10 Basics for Spring

International Women’s Day 2016

Happy International Women’s Day 2016!   IWD was established to celebrate the social, economic, cultural and political achievement of women.

Women’s issues have been at the forefront for many years,  but don’t believe the work is over. The progress that was moving so fluidly just a few years ago has slowed in many places across the world.

This year’s call to action is Gender Parity.   Actress Patricia Arquette said it perfectly at the 2015 Oscars, “It’s is our time to have wage equality once and for all” and Hollywood and the world are continuing the conversation.  But that’s not enough, we all need to make the pledge for Gender Parity.

How will you work, live and take action for Gender Parity?

Here is how one of my friends is speaking her truth

The simplest way is to acknowledge it’s real, your actions can do something about it and start the conversation today.

Tips on Tuesday – How to Apply Foundation

Over the years, I have found the three best ways for me to apply foundation.

Each application process provides a different level of coverage and effect.

The first and the one we all have used is our finger. Yes, those ten little digits can be great a putting on a quick light covering of BB or CC cream. This is my go-to method for weekends, a day off or vacation. The creams are typically light and can give good coverage plus they come with SPF.

When using my fingers I use my ring and middle fingers – these are two of the weaker fingers so they aren’t a rough on your delicate facial skin. I use my pinky finger to work around my eyes.

The next applicator I use is my beauty blender. Now, I know not everyone has a beauty blender, so if you don’t have one, cosmetic sponges work just as well. The blenders are great for a medium coverage of foundation, so for work days, they are perfect.

You start by wetting the blender, squeeze out any excess water. Then just dip the blender into the foundation and stipple your face. Stippling is the dotting of the face with foundation repeatedly until the desired level of coverage is achieved

I use the large end for my forehead, cheeks, chin, nose and jaw and the smaller tip for around the eyes.

Blenders are also perfect covering any type of camouflages or concealers one might be wearing.

The last applicator I use in my Foundation Brush by Sigma Beauty. I love this brush; as a matter of fact my niece took mine with her back to college, so I had to get a new one.

This brush works great with liquid or cream foundations.

I typically dampen the brush, lightly dip the tip of the brush in the foundation and then apply to my face in a swirling motion. It provides great coverage quickly and because it applies the foundation lightly and evenly I can layer just the right amount of foundation I want.

I don’t recommend using a brush over camouflages and concealers as the swirling motion has a tendency to spread them around.

What’s your favorite way to apply foundation?
Got a question?  Ask Aejaie

Tips on Tuesday – How to Find the Perfect Foundation

Selecting Foundation has to be one of the most confusing things my clients come to me about.  So, I’m going to try and make this as simple as possible.

First let’s start by pointing out your complexion and your skin tone are not the same thing.

Your complexion is the shade of your skin – light, medium, dark.  Mine is light in the winter and medium in the summer.  Your complexion changes with sun exposure, diet, medication etc.

Your skin tone or undertone is the amount of Melanin or pigment in your skin, which doesn’t change with exposure to the sun.

There are two types of Melanin – Eumelanin which is black and brown pigments and pheomelanin which is Red or Yellow.    Each of us has a specific level of each, with the level of pheomelanin being the driving force behind the type of foundation we choose.

So how do you find out if you have Red (cool), Yellow (warm) or a neutral undertone in your skin?

There are a couple quick tricks you can use to find out.

Do you look better wearing Gold or Silver Jewelry?  If gold looks better on your skin, you’re most likely a warm skin tone, if silver looks better on your skin, you’re a cool skin tone – if you great in both, you most likely a neutral skin tone.

In natural day light, look at the inside of your wrist.  Do you see blue/purple veins?  Then you’re a cool skin tone.  Do you see green veins?  You’re warm skin tone.  Maybe you can really distinguish either, than you’re a neutral skin tone.

Now you know you skin tone – let’s find a color!

Most manufactures have a labeling system.

Make Up For Ever uses Y for yellow or Warm and R for red or Cool.  The Artist at Make Up For Ever will also help you select the perfect shade.  The artist at Sephora, Ulta, MAC or any other cosmetic counter will happily do the same, but remember these are businesses and they are there to sell cosmetics.

If you’re not ready for the cosmetic counter yet and will be making your selection at the drug store, which carries some wonderful cosmetics, personally I like Revlon and Neutrogena.   Hold the foundation up to your wrist; does it look like a match? Try a couple different shades and you’ll find the right match.

So you found two, one lighter and one just a little darker, because summer is coming.   I say go for the lighter shade – it’s easy to take a bronzing powder and darken a light foundation, but there is nothing that can be done for foundation that’s too dark.

How do you select your foundation?

Do you have a question, ask away.